


What you win or lose

by bluenna



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: M/M, Soulmate AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-28
Updated: 2016-01-28
Packaged: 2018-05-16 19:13:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5837632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluenna/pseuds/bluenna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>based on the prompt: "*whispers* Murphamy soulmate AU. where the soulmate's first words to the person are tattooed on them and Murphy has a dirty mouth"</p>
            </blockquote>





	What you win or lose

**Author's Note:**

> murphy's dirty mouth is unfortunately mostly absent in this fic but wey hey at least ....
> 
> i forgot where i was going with that
> 
> its 5.30am and im tried

Bellamy was sixteen, just like everyone else, when the words appeared on his wrist.

Unlike everyone else, he wasn't eager to share what his soulmate's first words to him were going to be. It took him ten minutes to process the sentence carved on his skin with an unpolished script, and after a series of controlled inhales and exhales he got himself under control. He ripped a piece of his least beloved shirt and as wrapped the piece of cloth around his wrist and tied it, he decided he wouldn't be made fun of, not even kindly.

He was disappointed in himself for believing he would be one of those soulmates you would see in movies or read about in books, when the truth was he might never actually get along with his soulmate. He refused to meet his mother's eyes when he joined her for breakfast and kept his mouth shut throughout the whole day. He dodged Octavia's questions and changed the cloth around his wrist when it started to unravel.

Hearing his soulmate say the words didn't change anything.

–

”I really need someone to suck my dick.” 

The boy appears out of nowhere and Bellamy blinks a few times before the words register. He snaps his head up and sees a boy standing next to him, his face cleanly shaven and hair slicked back. He's sneering and looking at the crowd taking in their new home, and Bellamy thinks oh no, before he realizes he should probably say something.

”What?” he manages to ask weakly.

The boy turns to look at him and considers him for a moment. ”I've spent too much time in the Sky Box, I need to get off,” he says, and.

Bellamy closes his eyes. He counts to ten and tries to fight the panic rising in his chest.

He has just met his soulmate.

–

Whatever the hell we want turns out not to be that good of an idea after all. 

Bellamy had come down to Earth because of his sister, and based his methods as a leader on that, but he hadn't taken account of his stupid asshole soulmate who apparently had no other goal in life but to piss off as many people as possible.

There's a twist deep in his gut when Clarke confronts Murphy about killing Wells, but he doesn't let it show on his face. When Murphy tells the group at large that he doesn't have to answer to anyone Bellamy says, ”Come again?” just like he would if it were anyone else and looks at Murphy like every thought that's transparent on the boy's face didn't make his heart stutter.

He barely hears what Clarke says about society and punishment, his eyes tracking Murphy; how the boy tries to find a person to back him up and defend himself even though the crowd has already made his mind.

”I say we float him,” someone says, and Bellamy takes half a step forward.

”That's not what I'm saying,” Clarke says before Bellamy even gets to open his mouth.

”Why not? He deserves to float. It's justice.”

”Revenge isn't justice,” Clarke almost spits.

”It's justice! Float him!”

The crowd chants and Bellamy stares at Murphy while the boy looks around him, bewildered and clearly scared, then runs like he could get through the crowd without anyone stopping him. Someone trips him and he falls. The crowd's cheering drowns the thud his body makes as it hits the ground.

Octavia starts to rush over and Bellamy grabs her arm and pulls her back automatically. First his instincts tell him to keep his sister safe, then he holds on just to keep himself from helping Murphy.

Murphy deserves this, he thinks forcefully. And Bellamy needs to listen to the people.

In the end he isn't able to kick the box from under the boy. Instead he cuts the rope and banishes Murphy. It's the best he can do.

–

Murphy comes back. He brings the sickness, and still, still Bellamy cannot hate him. 

Murphy shoots Raven, and still, the detest Bellamy feels is nothing to compared to the relief over having the boy safe.

Murphy leaves with Jaha, and Bellamy misses him. His heart aches, but he keeps going, because this was never just about him and Murphy, there are other people who need to be saved and he can't ignore that just because of the sentence on his wrist.

–

”Have you met them?” Octavia asks for the 100th time. She looks down at him from where she's sitting on her horse, Asteroid, and Bellamy meets her eyes briefly before looking away.

”Yeah,” he says, although he knows Octavia will only keep asking more and more now that he has answered.

”Who is it?” Octavia hops down from Asteroid's back and grabs Bellamy's elbow with her free hand. When Bellamy doesn't reply, she continues. ”You know I don't care who it is as long as they make you happy.”

”He...” Bellamy clears his throat. ”He's gone.”

Octavia pulls her hand back. ”He's dead?” she asks after a moment, her eyes shiny with tears of sympathy.

Bellamy shakes his head. ”No,” he rushes to say, and reaches for Octavia's hand. ”he just isn't here.”

Octavia frowns, blinks and gathers her thoughts. Bellamy has no idea what conclusion she comes to. She smiles at him kindly before untangling her hand from his and turns to Asteroid. ”I hope he'll make you happy,” she says finally.

Bellamy hopes so, too.

–

Murphy comes back six months after Mount Weather. He stumbles through the gates of the camp and just stands there staring at the sight in front of him. Bellamy sees him come in and his heart flips in his chest. He forgets the conversation he's in the middle of and leaves Miller to stand there confused in order to… he doesn't even know. He makes his way across the yard and stops right in front of Murphy, his hands shaking slightly and his tongue heavy in his mouth. He wants to say something, wants to ask how the boy has been, maybe sound accusing with his greeting, but he finds anything other than pulling the boy close to him impossible.

”Didn't know you were that desperate,” Murphy says against Bellamy's shoulder, but he sounds breathless and Bellamy knows he's not the only one affected.

”Shut up,” Bellamy mutters. He raises his hand and threads his fingers through Murphy's hair., breathing out in relief as the boy doesn't protest. ”Has anyone ever told you you have a filthy mouth?” he asks, not finding anything better to say.

Murphy laughs, his body vibrating against Bellamy's chest. ”Yeah.”

”Yeah,” Bellamy repeats. He pulls back and looks Murphy in his eyes. He has never properly looked at the younger boy before, and now that he does, he finds it impossible to look away. He drags his hand from Murphy's neck to his cheek and brushes his thumb over the boy's cheek. ”You should've believed them. Having the word 'dick' carved onto your skin isn't as fun as one would think.”

Murphy's eyes widen and he steps back, away from Bellamy,. Bellamy lets him go and blinks. He hadn't meant to say that.

”Murphy,” he says, trying to get his limbs to work and get closer to the boy again. His fingers twitch at the loss of contact and somewhere in the back of his mind he realizes they must be causing at least a small scene.

Murphy takes another step back. ”You knew.” 

”I-”

”You knew?”

Bellamy closes his mouth with a click. Murphy frowns at him, and Bellamy curses himself. He had known from the moment he had spoken to Murphy what the boy's words had been, yet he had been stupid enough to think Murphy suspected the truth.

Bellamy swallows. ”I did.”

Murphy cools his expression and turns on his heel, walking right back out of the gates. Bellamy stays frozen for a whole five seconds before he rushes after him.

”Murphy.”

”Fuck off.”

”Murphy!”

Murphy comes to a halt and turns to glare at Bellamy. ”I'm your soulmate,” he spits out. ”I'm your soulmate and you've been treating me like a piece of shit since day one.”

Bellamy tries to deny it but he can't.

”I thought...” Murphy trails off. He bites his lip and runs a hand through his hair. ”I thought there was someone out there who could accept me as I am. Just the screwed up, fucked up me.” He tries to laugh but it comes out as half a sob and Bellamy closes his eyes.

He has failed. He has failed the one person in the world who means more to him that anyone else.

”But of course it's you,” Murphy continues, and snorts. ”Our golden boy. This is hilarious.”

Bellamy takes a breath in and holds it. This isn't about him after all, is it? This is about Murphy. Murphy who is flawed and hated and has nothing to fight for except for himself. Murphy doesn't think they're mismatched because he dislikes Bellamy, but because he disliked himself.

Bellamy moves so fast Murphy doesn't realize he has moved until he's in front of the younger boy, grabbing his forearm in order to keep him put.

”Let go of me.”

”No.”

”I said let go-”

”And I said no,” Bellamy says. ”If I do you'll leave and I can't have that.”

”Really?” Murphy asks, sneering. ”You seem to have been doing just fine.”

”I haven't. And I don't expect you to believe me. I don't expect you to trust me or forgive me.” He takes a moment to search Murphy's eyes, but they show nothing but disbelief. ”But I don't care what they think. There's a reason I've got your words on me and you mine, and I don't disagree.”

Murphy scoffs and looks away. ”You don't love me.”

Bellamy shakes his head. ”No, I don't. But I could.”

Murphy freezes. He stares into the woods on their right and Bellamy watches him swallow forcefully before he turns to look at Bellamy. ”You're lying.”

”I'm not.”

Murphy lifts his chin. ”Prove it.”

Bellamy doesn't answer. He tugs at Murphy's arm and steps closer when the other boy does too. He looks down at the boy, raises his hand to run his thumb over his cheek like he did before and leans down, slowly enough for Murphy to back down, but fast enough for the other boy to know he has no doubt of what he's doing.

He presses his lips against Murphy's firmly, his eyes closing when Murphy sighs and leans against him. He bites softly onto Murphy's bottom lip and the boy gasps softly before he catches himself and pushes against Bellamy with urgency. Bellamy staggers a step backwards and their mouths separate before Murphy's on him, his hands in Bellamy's hair and his teeth pressing sharply against Bellamy's lip, hard enough to sting but not near enough to draw blood. Murphy tugs at Bellamy's hair, twisting it in his fingers and Bellamy growls, pushes forward until Murphy has no other choice but to walk backwards. His back hits the rock Bellamy had prayed would still be there and Bellamy pins him against it, letting his hands roam up and down Murphy's body, answering Murphy's every breathless noise with one of his own.

Bellamy remembers he had some kind of point to make, and pulls back, but doesn't step back and keeps his hands on Murphy. ”I will,” he breaths out.

Murphy stares at him with dark eyes. ”What?” he rasps.

”I will,” Bellamy repeats. ”I'll keep proving it to you everyday.”

Murphy blinks at him and Bellamy swears he has never seen anything as beautiful.

”Yeah, alright,” Murphy says. He stares at Bellamy for a while longer before he grins and tugs Bellamy back in by his jacket. Bellamy smiles against Murphy's lips and kisses him until he forgets everything else.

**Author's Note:**

> that absent dirty mouth i was talking about? found it. its on bellamy
> 
> (if u wanna u can send me prompts @lightsabrey.tumblr.com)


End file.
